Sunday, February 27, 2011

The Terrible Twos Already?

(insert laugh here)....the past few weeks have found us entering into a phase where patience and sanity are pushing the limits. I consider my husband and I somewhat intelligent people; however, no school, seminar, or parenting website has even tried to explain how the heck you deal with a toddler's tantrums. Are these the terrible twos?

It started about a month ago. I try and take every other Friday off to spend time with our Little Miss. She is 16 (almost 17) months old now and still fascinates me as I watch her advance. On this particular day, we did our usual morning breakfast, followed by a fantastic walk, great lunch with daddy, and then mama had this wonderful idea of getting the weekly grocery shopping done before the weekend rush started. Big mistake! As we walked into the doors of Target, Little Miss kindly started to tug away from me. Grabbing her to stop as I got a buggy, she proceeded to throw herself down to the ground, kicking and screaming bloody murder. Are you kidding me? With people looking and giving me the "control your kid" eye, my blood pressure began to boil. Do I spank her right here? Do I leave or become that parent that has a screaming kid throughout the store? I had no freaking clue. All I knew was I had a screaming kid and I was pissed. To add to that episode, these tantrums are starting to happen at restaurants or social events too. My husband is a lot more patient with her than I am, but we are still in this flux on how to discipline her effectively.

It's good birth control I suppose, but how the heck do parents do it? We have been blessed with an extremely independent (i.e. stubborn) daughter. Watching her these past few months, I have been amazed at how quick she catches onto things, and more importantly how sneaky she is. She knows exactly what I'm telling her - I know it. But, when she is in a mood or doesn't get what she wants, the battle is on and God help me it wears me out. How do we discipline a toddler? We both believe in spanking; however, I don't think spanking every other minute is very productive. Then comes timeout which is a whole other story to me. She will not stay in the corner for anything. It's so nerve racking. People are constantly asking when we are having another one. Our answer - as soon as we can tame this one! HA!

Long story short, just laugh with us during this stage. There are nights when we find ourselves exhausted and annoyed at each other because of different parenting tactics or having to leave an event early because we have an insanely grouchy Little Miss. I swear I'm starting to see gray hair and Dave laughs because he thinks he is balding more and more each day. All in all, I think this is God's way of getting us back - for being the stubborn children we were to our parents and for reminding us that, even though intelligent, we sure as heck don't know everything.

Much love,

Tuesday, February 1, 2011


I had mentioned in a recent post that my grandmother has been continually ill this past year. It's hard for me to really capture how neat of a lady she is, but if you are lucky enough to know her you can understand exactly what I'm trying to say. She is by far the most genuine person I know and sees people for who they really are. She's smarter than folks give her credit for and she has an amazing faith. She's my Grammy and if I'm being completely honest, watching her age has been a really hard adjustment for me.

She started her career working the 7 to 3 shift as a floor RN. After working and retiring from a local hospital at 65, she decided to come back into healthcare as a diabetic educator and continued working until she reached 70 years old. To this day I run into people that have worked alongside her. Each of them tell me similar stories: how she always cared for the patient first and was by the book when it came to nursing. That's our Gram...always making sure everyone else is okay before herself. The caretaking even spilled over into our family life. If one of us got sick or fell and scabbed a knee, Gram was there to rescue us. When my mom had breast cancer, Gram was the one who picked us up from school and made sure we were okay. She has been a rock through everything, quietly protecting us in more ways than we knew.

After my grandfather passed away in 2001, she moved in with my folks. I was in college at the time and I know it was a major adjustment for my parents, but I so looked forward to driving home and spending time with her. We used to stay up for hours sitting on her bed talking about life. The conversation could go from shopping to boys to religion and I loved it. She has a way of telling you the truth in a gentle and honest way. Never once has she said a hateful thing about someone else - she might not like what they are doing, but she has never been hateful. Instead, she answers each rough patch with two simple phrases: "patience darlin patience" or "such the life."

She was the one who, after I brought my now husband home for the first time, looked at me and said, "I like him darlin" while everyone else was sizing him up. I'll never forget that! She was smitten with him before I was and I have to admit she has good taste - I'll take smart and humble over cocky and dumb any day! Her advice on love was always the same: don't worry about what others think; you have to decide what makes you happy.

It's those little tidbits she has given over the years that I have come to be grateful for. We have had some pretty close calls with her lately - one while she was staying with my husband and I and another where she could not remember our names. It's crazy how you jump into action when someone you love is in need. I've learned first hand you will do anything when placed in that moment. In each little episode though, somehow/someway she has amazingly bounced back and gotten to come home to share more memories with our family. She comes home a little weaker than before but constantly remains the lady that wants to do nothing more than to be with her family.

I know I'm running on borrowed time lately and the wisdom she has bestowed upon me is such a blessing, but I hope that I can live up to the great lady she is. She is my hero and someone that, even when she is gone, I will remember forever. I have started getting real emotional each week when she is with my little girl reading a book or playing with baby dolls. It's in those little moments that I cherish memories that are being made and appreciate our different generations being able to spend time together.

Until next time...much love!